Pessimistic take effect again

I Dun know why... I m feeling demoralize and UN-Peace at heart lately... Not sure if it's because with all the unhappy and negative stuffs that are happening right from the start of the year...

At the start of the year, it's like really uncertain about continuing what I m doing or a job switch.. But job switch will bring along lots of uncertainty... And also weighing the potential at current place... It's really a tough decision... Plus the maid contract expiring this year = need to take long leave... ???

Just as all these uncertainty in the mind going on... The sudden dismissal of a relative in CNY set me thinking about what we really want in life... Life is so unpredictable... U never know what is installed for u... It also strike me thinking what we bring with us here to this earth and what we are going to leave behind... That's when I feel that children is the best thing u can leave behind for the one living who still needs to face the challenge of live, especially that for only child... If u have your own family, it's still not that bad... else siblings is really your source of support... But of course not all siblings are that close as well..We often see siblings fighting over legacy as well... 2 sides to the coin.

But still... Seriously I m not sure of what the future has installed for our future generation.. With all the natural disaster... Mankind is so helpless... Especially this japan quake... Really scary and it so demoralizing to see how nature can destroy mankind maybe it's a reflection of how we human destroy the mother earth... But still who determine who will have to suffer the consequences? Fate? God? Luck? No reason and unexplainable...

Now that the nuclear plant is going melt down... How many more people are going to suffer the effects... Unknown figure and future...

And our next generation is so vulnerable to mother nature and all the diseases and virus... And we are so helpless in protecting them against all these... Sometimes I hate to think about it but I often ask myself, although it's natural for us to produce the next generation, the kind of joy and love that comes along with a new life... But would it be the case of if u really love the next generation, u should not even bring them to this world that is full of uncertainty? Something debatable... I m not being negative but I seriously feel that every parents would like to bring joy and happiness to our next generation like what they bring to us.. But is it something within our control...? The answer is clearly no...